Gender and Pronouns 101

Alright, so the author of this site is Lux, and they are genderqueer.

Gender is distinct from sex. “Sex” describes one’s biology (genitals, hormone makeup, etc) while the term “gender” describes one’s internal identity. Using these terms, we would describe Lux’s sex as “female”, since they were born with a vagina and subsequently developed feminine secondary sex characteristics by means of estrogen and progesterone. Lux’s gender identity is “genderqueer”.

So, what does “genderqueer” mean?

The genders we’re most familiar with are ‘men’ and ‘women’. However, rather than being a dichotomy of one or the other, gender is actually quite fluid for some people. Imagine it on a sliding scale where “man” is on one end and “woman” is on the other. Most people are comfortable on one end of the spectrum or the other. The term “genderqueer” describes individuals who identify as somewhere in between the two. There are also other terms like “agender” which describes people who do not identify with a gender at all.

If we’re looking at gender as a sliding scale, Lux’s particular version of genderqueerity encompasses most of the middle ground, tending toward the “man” end of the spectrum. They describe themselves as a “female with masculine genderqueer identity.” Once again, ‘female’ describes their sex, while ‘masculine genderqueer’ describes how they’re non-binary but tend toward one end of the spectrum.

What does this mean for you?

All Lux asks is that you refrain from using feminine pronouns (she, her, hers) and heavily feminine nouns (wife, actress) when talking about them, if at all possible. The pronouns they prefer are the gender-neutral ones already built into English: they/them/their.

Here are a few examples of ways in which to deal with nouns:

Use “spouse” instead of “wife”
Use “actor” instead of “actress”
Use “bro” or “sib” (short for sibling) instead of “sis”
Use “dude” or “guy” instead of “lady” or “gal”
Do not use “miss,” “girl,” or “woman”

Hopefully this clears things up a bit! If you have any questions, feel free to contact Lux or use the Google machine to get a more rounded perspective.

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