Positive post with content notes: sleep, food, anxiety, racism re: Mike Brown
Wheeee! It was so nice to sleep in my own bed today, and in a room that was ACTUALLY DARK. HOLY FUCK. My hotel window was westward-facing, which was just **terrific** for sleeping in the evening. The curtains were thick, but nothing stops the light from peeking under and above them. However, the pillows were down and while I’m against that ethically, there’s no denying how amazingly comfortable it was.
So, the purpose of my trip was to teach the third shift people how to use our registers and generally inform them of company policy on things. Which means that I didn’t have to do any shift duties, although they did have me make labels for some of the product in the store one night. (I love being given responsibilities, it makes me feel so boss.)
Business was verrryyyy slow. So, I spent a lot of my time joking around with the people on the shift. Two dudes, one chick. I got along with the guys so well that I hung out with them after work twice over the course of the week. The first time was literally the first day I worked with them. Doesn’t happen often for me, meeting people and immediately deciding they’re cool enough to hang out with. :p (Though only the girl could talk about Doctor Who with me, so they lost some points there.)
I got lots of hugs from the guys, and also ended up flirting with one of them all week. :3 I got a kiss from him when I left the store yesterday morning. Spend a week bitching about the oppressive system we live in and sparks are bound to fly.
My boyfriend person Kyle visited me on Sunday and we cuddled and watched anime and had fun playing. ^.^ He’s a sweetie.
I really missed my cats and Degon while I was gone. But it was definitely a great chance to kind of reset and get back in touch with my fundamentals: I’m silly, I’m supportive, I’m caring, I’m a gigantic flirt, I’m a pretty responsible adult, but I’m also sick and need to do things to work around that.
I feel like I did an awesome job of eating enough, though it required not taking Vyvanse pretty much the entire time. (I lived.) I also tapered down the amount of coffee I was drinking, since even without taking Vyvanse I had a hard time eating. (Chalking it up to subconscious stress/anxiety related to travel.)
Not having any responsibilities aside from work was very relaxing as well, and helped me figure out what my priorities are, independent of my obligations. I found a vape store, for example, since I knew I was going to run out of my e-cig juice. I ran a mile on the hotel treadmill one day. I stretched a lot. I bought nail clippers and nail polish remover at Walmart. I kept up with my friends and social stuff on Facebook.
I basically just tried to do whatever felt good to me at the time. Showered and shaved when it felt best to do so. (Decided to go ahead and let my armpit hair grow out.) Ate whatever sounded good whenever I felt like eating. Made innuendos to my heart’s content. Had some intense conversations and did my super-knowledgeable-supportive-friend routine.
Oh, and I told some motherfucker to get out of my store! I decided to climb on top of this thing between the convenience store and the Hardee’s on the other side of the building. Some guy saw me and asked why I didn’t join the military, which started a very long conversation that somehow ended up on the topic of Ferguson.
He was confusingly pro-government and yet anti-government, as these types are. And he brought up Ferguson in a way that showed he thought Mike Brown done fucked up and Darren Wilson did what was right. Since I was already pretty done with this conversation, I asked him if he thought any of Mike Brown’s actions that day were deserving of him being shot multiple times (in the back, no less) and killed.
It took him a moment, but he said yes, he did. So I said, “Please leave the store. I would really appreciate it if you left the store now.” He was edging out, but felt it necessary to restate several more times that he thought Mike Brown deserved to get shot. (Which I translate as “deserved to die”.)
I’ve never done that before, asking someone to leave. I was pissed, though. It was really satisfying, and I still feel good about how I handled that conversation. Shit, I feel good about how I handled myself on this trip, period. It was like pressing the reset button and now I have a better idea of what life even is.
Alright, I’ve spent long enough on this blog post. I switched the theme because I felt like my long paragraphs were looking too bulky, plus this theme is a little darker. Tell me if you hate it, but I probably won’t change it back. :p I’m gonna do some laundry and pick up around the apartment, I think.